Har Hath Mein Hoga apna Khud ka (Phone): New Scheme for BPL

NEW DELHI: In what could turn out to be its calling card for the 2014 general elections, the government is finalizing a Rs 7,000 crore scheme to give one mobile phone to every family living below the poverty line.
Sources in the PMO said the scheme—Har Hath Mein hoga apna khud ka (phone)—expected to be announced by PM Manmohan Singh on August 15.

Mr. Kapil Sibbal was the first person from the cabinet to confirm the news, " He said, Yes it is true. We are distributing Lava Mobiles (lambi battery wala phone) to all people who are Below Poverty line." When we asked him about the plans of Government regarding providing basic amenities to people he said " WTF!! We are giving you mobile phone so that you can call just dial and get all what you need!! " Later when some one asked him Sir, but how will people who are BPL be able to access anything in want of money? He replied, " Big deal!! Sell your phone and pay your bills. Government will buy your phones, Dude you press reporters are really sick. Let me go now have to play Rammi with Rahul baba."

Surprisingly Mr. Laalu Prashad whose party RJD (Ragda Jhagda Dal) happens to be part of on going UPA govt. didn't seemed much impressed with scheme and said " Dhatt tere ki! What Sarkarwa is doing wa is bhery shocking...Aree deiva ha e hai to bhains deibo, Give Buffaaalow and Buffallow give milk and Milk pee aa or mauj levaa. "

Opposition Party's senior leader Mr. L.K. Advani updated on his blog, " Govenrment is trying to lure people for votes. We have done the same thing before and lost... LOL. They are so least innovative in their ideas."

When we contacted to PM Manmohan Singh for his comments he was shocked! " Mujhe fir se nahi bataya unhone... Madam ji, Hate you for this." He said with tears in his eyes. One more person was seen sad with coming of the news, Former telecom minister Mr. A Raja. No wonder why!

-Siddhant Sharma
Please Note: The story is entirely false